This is a long long post but this was the last time we were all together and life seemed "normal". Mom stayed with me for over a week. Sweet Drew let her sleep in our big comfy bed with me each night and he slept on the couch. We had some real convo's as we knew her health was declining. She was sleeping many hours of the day and feeling pretty bad. We had no idea at the time she would be gone in a month but knew it wasn't great.
I remember falling asleep each of those nights talking and holding hands. I close my eyes often and remember those nights and her little hand in mine. We talked about dying...she had questions about things we would do after she was gone, she had advice for me for when she was no longer here, I gave her my approval and blessing for her to let go and not hang on for me at any time she was tired and ready. I stared at her while she slept some and I remember some of those nights pretty clear. I remember the week leading up to Thanksgiving going to Whole Foods and picking out food to cook. I remember her making all the red bows for my window wreaths for Christmas. I remember sitting on the couch with it dark and the fire place rolling while we talked and made lists of what to get done before all the family arrived.
I remember falling asleep each of those nights talking and holding hands. I close my eyes often and remember those nights and her little hand in mine. We talked about dying...she had questions about things we would do after she was gone, she had advice for me for when she was no longer here, I gave her my approval and blessing for her to let go and not hang on for me at any time she was tired and ready. I stared at her while she slept some and I remember some of those nights pretty clear. I remember the week leading up to Thanksgiving going to Whole Foods and picking out food to cook. I remember her making all the red bows for my window wreaths for Christmas. I remember sitting on the couch with it dark and the fire place rolling while we talked and made lists of what to get done before all the family arrived.
Chris and his family came on Wednesday before Thanksgiving for the day and well spent the day here together. The kids played ball and I showed everyone around Hoover and Ross Bridge. It was super cold that day like high of 30 or something insane! Later that day Drew's family came including his grandmother from Iowa. She made her first trip to our house. We had lasagna on Wednesday night and wine and we all sat around and talked. The next morning Drew had to work so mom, dad, the boys and I watched the Macy's parade and I made casserole and muffins with mimosa's. Drew's family visited Tuscaloosa then everyone came over later that night. We celebrated Thanksgiving the next day since Drew was off.
We fried a turkey, had a honey baked ham, Stacy made green bean casseroles, mom & I did mushroom casserole, macaroni and sweet potato casserole. Mom made her yummy trifle and we also ordered a cake from Whole Foods. Dad and Drew handled the frying while Mark and Stacy entertained the kids. I remember mom napping most of the day and was shocked when she woke up and I had already put the casseroles in the oven.
That moment was very sad for me. Most of the family was upstairs or outside and dad was on the couch...I was looking at mom's recipe for the mushroom casserole and had a question for mom. I poked my head into her room and saw she was sleeping so peacefully so I just figured it out on my own. I remember standing in kitchen in tears thinking this was one day going to be my new reality. Having questions and not having her answer...looked over and it was just dad on the couch and me in the kitchen and that was a sobering reality check.
That moment was very sad for me. Most of the family was upstairs or outside and dad was on the couch...I was looking at mom's recipe for the mushroom casserole and had a question for mom. I poked my head into her room and saw she was sleeping so peacefully so I just figured it out on my own. I remember standing in kitchen in tears thinking this was one day going to be my new reality. Having questions and not having her answer...looked over and it was just dad on the couch and me in the kitchen and that was a sobering reality check.
The day was beautiful though and filled with many blessings. JB and Becks got to spend time with their great grandmother. We all got to be together one last time, in spite of it all we did share smiles and laughs even if they were forced and most of all we made memories and enjoyed each other, good food and fellowship. I am so thankful for the moments and pictures captured. Two videos with all of us in them and some lovely family pictures. PS ...boys your dad was doing no shave November hence the interesting mustache he had! =) ha
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| This is the last picture my parents ever took together. |
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| So thankful for all of these women. |
JB & Becks:
You kids loved the food...JB you kept insisting on more Turkey cake and you loved the ham. Beckett your favorite was the sweet potatoes and macaroni. Here is what I believe is the last video I have of you boys and your Nana.
The next day we enjoyed football and watched the UA/Auburn game. It was a sad loss...last game we all watched together...which we didn't know at the time.
Sunday....that day I remember crisp and clear. That would be the last day my mom was ever in my home. We woke up and got ready we were going to pick out a live tree. I needed mom's help because she was good at things like that. After many options we settled on one. Took JB's pic in front of it then headed to lunch at Mexican...JB you had your first gum ball!
I remember the guys getting the tree in the house and mom telling you which way to turn it and which side was the "good side". I also remember she was in her pink North Face fleece and tennis shoes and was out in the green space kicking the Woody ball with JB and laughing I stood at the window and cried specifically telling myself...
STEPHANIE! Remember this moment. Remember the weather, what they were wearing, how she was smiling because it was precious. My parents loaded their car and we said our good byes. I remember standing in the garage right behind the golf cart...mom and I shared a hug and kisses and a longer hug that seemed to last a while. I laid my head on her shoulder then cried as they drove off. I had no clue she would never be back but it is almost as though the moment knew...the hug knew...or something because it is so clear. That moment I watched them drive off and honk would be the last.
STEPHANIE! Remember this moment. Remember the weather, what they were wearing, how she was smiling because it was precious. My parents loaded their car and we said our good byes. I remember standing in the garage right behind the golf cart...mom and I shared a hug and kisses and a longer hug that seemed to last a while. I laid my head on her shoulder then cried as they drove off. I had no clue she would never be back but it is almost as though the moment knew...the hug knew...or something because it is so clear. That moment I watched them drive off and honk would be the last.
It was a sad and happy Thanksgiving. The whole point is to be Thankful and that I was. I soaked in the whole 10 days she spent here. I only wished I had written down every moment and every memory because I can't remember all we discussed. Lord, Thank you for that week and the blessing of allowing us to all be together one last time.
This is the last picture I ever took with my mother - November 29th 2013
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